Do you ever feel overwhelmed? Do you ever feel like you have too much to do? Have you made too many commitments? Or committed to projects or people you’d really rather blow off? Are certain friends, clients, or family members driving you crazy and you can’t deal with the drama right now? If any of this feels familiar to you, then keep reading because I have a surprise for you AND a solution!
I’ve made you two videos that specifically address overwhelm. I’m not talking about the kind of overwhelm that overtakes us when we lose a parent or a body part or our home in a natural disaster. I’m talking about the garden variety habit of busyness and clutter that we create every day that ravages our energy and self-esteem and leaves us paralyzed and ineffective.
In this first video, I’m in my office, feeling a little overwhelmed myself with everything I have committed to because I don’t know how I can get it all done on deadline. I notice tightness in my shoulders and neck, and some tightness in my stomach, too. I feel my heart beating faster because I’m feeling scared of dropping some of the balls I’m juggling.
Just taking a few minutes to notice what’s going on in my body – otherwise known as mindfulness – makes all the difference. I notice that my breath automatically begins to deepen when I give myself permission to pause and just notice what IS. I know I have created all of this, and once I pause and let this awareness seep in – that I have created everything in my space, I begin to feel gratitude for all of it. The piles of paper on the desk, the overflowing inbox, the projects I’m under contract to produce, the classes I’m teaching, the clients I’m coaching, I have welcomed all of this into my life, and I love it all. I’m suddenly so much more relaxed as I look around my office. I realize that if I created it, then I can also uncreate it if I choose to. I can also choose to receive support. I can choose to throw stuff away that is not serving me, that I’m never going to read. Once it’s in the trash, it no longer taunts me for ignoring it, or breaking the promise that I will get to it someday. I give myself permission to clear what’s not contributing to my energy so I can give more of my attention to what is.
The second video is a little more racy. In this video, I bare all and get a little vulnerable with how it feels to be staggering under the self-inflicted weight of overwhelm.I say self-inflicted because we create the very situations that we then claim are overwhelming us. We must do this for a reason, right? It makes us feel important, or worthy, or valued because we have so much to do, so many obligations.To be clear, I’m talking about the day-to-day agitation and stress of living in the 21st century, and the pressure to be “on” all the time. While the quotidien overwhelm most of us experience is not triggered by grief over the loss of a beloved, there is a sense in which our souls are deeply grieving for us. When you are feeling waylaid by overwhelm in your life that’s of your own design, what if you asked your soul what it would like in this moment? What if you paused to listen?
I’m a big advocate of “off” time, of me-time. Some people call it selfish. I call it restorative. In this video, I share one of my secrets to living a successful and stress-free life.
How often do you say yes when you really mean no? Why did you say yes to when you really meant no? Were you afraid of disappointing someone? Were you afraid that if you said no you would be punished for it? Is being a people-pleaser wreaking havoc with your personal self-care and time management? These are profound questions to ask yourself. One of the hardest things to learn as humans is how to live in our own original truth. Don’t beat yourself up about it if you realize you have been betraying your own truth for years. Just notice your pattern. Notice it and decide if you want to continue it. Without judgment, without making yourself wrong, just pay attention to the feelings and thoughts that start to emerge when you sit with these questions. Decide to take action if you want to change and create something different in the future.
I’d love to know what comes up for you! And as always, I’m here to support you on the path of transformation!